Hidden Mechanisms - Recap
Part 1: Mild Withdrawals: Why They Mislead Us
Part 2: The Mental Shortcut: Why We Avoid Internal Conflict
Part 3: Overloaded Thinking: When Drinking Thoughts Take Over
Part 4: Why Alcohol Memories Can Trigger Cravings
Part 5: The Social Scam: How We Were Conditioned to Drink
Recap: Hidden Mechanisms (Recap) ← you’re here
A craving can feel like one simple message: have a drink. But there can be several things sitting behind it. The alcohol from our last drink might be wearing off and making us feel rough. We could be trying to end an argument in our own head. Or we might have been picturing the drink for hours without realising how much pressure that was creating.
A memory might have brought up an old feeling, or a social situation could make drinking seem like the normal thing to do. So five different things could be pushing us towards the same drink.
Mild withdrawal
As the alcohol leaves our system, we could feel anxious, irritable, sweaty, shaky, sick, restless or generally off. We might put it down to stress, a hangover or a rough day. Then a drink makes us feel better for a while, so it looks like alcohol fixed the problem. If the discomfort is withdrawal, the drink has only eased it temporarily and kept the dependence going.
And that's why mild withdrawal is so easy to miss: the next drink feels like a solution when it is only restarting the cycle.
Read: mild alcohol withdrawals →
The mental shortcut
Sometimes the pressure comes from the argument in our own head. One part says, “Have a drink.” Another says, “Don’t do it.” The back-and-forth becomes tiring, and deciding to drink can bring relief before we’ve even had the first sip. The argument stops, and alcohol can get the credit even though it hasn’t actually done anything yet.
So the next time that conflict starts, “just have one” could sound like the quickest way out again.
Read: the mental shortcut →
Overloaded thinking
A drinking thought can turn into a full rehearsal. We picture where we’ll drink, what we’ll buy, how the first one will feel and how we’ll make sure it doesn’t get out of hand. The more we run through it, the more space it takes up. After a while, drinking can feel like it’s already part of the plan.
Giving in then looks like the easiest way to stop thinking about it.
Read: overloaded thinking →
An alcohol memory
A photo, song, smell, place or time of day can bring back an alcohol memory and an old feeling with it. The feeling could be warm, exciting or like the memory really means something. And we can take that feeling as proof that we miss drinking. But it might only be an old alcohol memory coming back.
And if we follow the memory into a drinking rehearsal, the pressure can build very quickly.
Read: alcohol memories →
Social conditioning
Before many of us had our first drink, we’d already seen alcohol used for celebrations, relaxation, feeling grown up and fitting in. Friends, family, films, advertising and everyday conversation kept repeating the same message. So drinking can feel normal before we ever stop to ask what alcohol is adding.
And when we quit, being the person without a drink can feel like we’re stepping outside the group.
Read: social conditioning around alcohol →
How they can pile up
And these things don’t always happen separately. We might feel shaky, anxious or generally off before the next drink. Then the thought of a drink comes up and starts an argument in our head. We picture the first drink, remember how relieved we felt last time and start planning when we’ll buy it.
Later, we meet people who are drinking and the whole thing looks normal again. By the time we pour the first one, it can feel like the decision came out of nowhere. But there was a build-up. Several things had led us to the same drink.
What was happening before we drank
We don’t need to analyse every thought all day. Sometimes it’s enough to think about the last couple of times we drank and ask what was going on before the first one. Were we physically uncomfortable? Were we arguing with ourselves? Had we already pictured the drink several times? Did a memory or social situation make alcohol look appealing?
It might be more than one of these. And that can show us where the pressure was really coming from. The urge didn’t mean we had to drink, and it didn’t prove we couldn’t stop.
It was several familiar things happening at the same time. And when we start spotting them earlier, we can see what’s happening before we turn it into a reason to drink.
— Brent