A lot of us take pride in being able to handle our alcohol.
We drink more than we used to and still look completely fine. We talk normally, get ourselves home, wake up for work and do what needs to be done.
So we take that as proof that we’re in control.
But the question is: Why do we need more than we used to?
In the beginning, a drink or two might have been enough to feel buzzed. Then over time the same amount started doing less.
One glass became two. Weekends turned into weekdays. We started drinking something stronger, poured a little more or started a little earlier.
None of those changes felt like a big deal on their own. But after a while, the amount that used to feel like a lot became our normal amount.
That’s alcohol tolerance. The alcohol hasn’t become weaker. Our brain and body have just got used to alcohol being there.
And that isn’t a harmless change. It’s one of the clearest warnings that our drinking is moving in the wrong direction.
What alcohol tolerance actually means
Tolerance isn’t about how drunk we look on one particular night. It’s the longer-term change in how much alcohol we usually need.
Food, sleep, body size and plenty of other things can affect how alcohol feels on the day. But if the amount we need has gone up over time, that’s tolerance.
We tend to compare tonight with last week, instead of looking at how much we drink now compared to a few years ago. Three or four drinks (or many more) might feel normal now but there was a time when that would have felt like a lot.
Why we can mistake tolerance for control
The problem is that tolerance takes away some of the warning signs that used to tell us we’d had enough.
So we can find ourselves thinking:
- Alcohol doesn’t hit me as hard anymore.
- No one can even tell when I’ve been drinking.
- I’m still functioning, so it can’t be that bad.
And those thoughts can sound reasonable when life still looks fine from the outside.
But our body still has to deal with every drink. Feeling less drunk doesn’t make the amount safer. It just makes it easier to keep going.
That’s the trap. The better we think we’re handling alcohol, the more alcohol we can put away before we feel a reason to stop.
The danger isn’t only the amount
We usually drink for the feeling, not because we’re trying to reach a certain number of drinks.
So if two drinks no longer do much, we have another. Then maybe another. We keep going until we get the feeling we came for.
And that can mean more alcohol and a bigger cost afterwards, just to get what a smaller amount used to give us.
But the danger isn’t only that we drink more each time. Drinking more can also turn into drinking more often.
We might start earlier because it takes longer to feel anything. We might have another drink before the effect drops away. Or we might drink the next day because we feel rough, anxious or unsettled.
And this is where tolerance can start moving us closer to dependence.
How tolerance can turn into dependence
Alcohol slows the nervous system down, including parts of the brain. When we drink heavily and regularly, our system starts pushing back to keep us going.
After a while, that doesn’t switch off the moment the alcohol wears off. Our system can stay wound up without it.
Then we might notice some withdrawal symptoms like feeling anxious, shaky, sweaty, sick or just not right when the alcohol wears off.
At first, it’s easy to put those feelings down to stress, poor sleep, too much coffee or just having a bad day.
But if another drink eases those feelings, alcohol has started doing a different job. Now it isn’t only about getting buzzed or switching off. We’re drinking because we feel worse without it.
And that’s where physical dependence may have already started to develop.
Not everyone who develops tolerance becomes dependent. But we don’t need to wait for a label for our drinking before we take a rising tolerance seriously.
What to look for in our own drinking
If we already know we have a tolerance, the next thing to look at is whether anything else has started changing:
- Has the amount I drink kept rising?
- Am I drinking earlier or more often than I used to?
- Do I feel noticeably worse when alcohol wears off?
- Does another drink make those feelings ease?
- Am I using the fact that I’m still functioning as proof that the amount isn’t a problem?
We might not answer yes to every question. We’re trying to see where our own drinking is heading, not comparing ourselves with someone who drinks more.
What tolerance tells us
The question isn’t whether we can still handle the amount. It’s what needing that amount is telling us.
If the amount keeps rising, the gaps between drinks are getting shorter or we’re starting to feel worse when alcohol wears off, our drinking has changed in a serious way.
So a rising tolerance needs to be taken seriously. It can be the stage where drinking more starts turning into needing alcohol.
— Brent