We’ve all heard it: “It’s just a habit.”
If that were true, we could have just stopped.
Nail-biting is a habit. So is checking your phone too often or cracking your knuckles.
Annoying? Sure. But we can usually stop when we want to.
Alcohol is different.
It changes our brain chemistry.
It creates emotional and physical dependency.
It doesn’t just live in our routines—it rewires our expectations, our stress response, even our sense of relief.
So no, drinking isn’t just a habit. And calling it one can keep us stuck.
Because when we think it’s a habit, we expect ourselves to just quit. And when we can’t, we don’t get curious—we get critical. We question our strength, our willpower, even our self-worth.
That’s not the truth. And it’s definitely not the way out.
What Makes a Habit a Habit
Habits are automatic behaviors triggered by cues. They form over time and are often reinforced by convenience or a momentary reward.
Maybe you tap your pen during meetings. Bite your nails when you’re nervous. Scroll your phone when you’re bored.
And when you notice, you can usually stop—no withdrawal, no emotional unraveling.
These habits live in your brain’s habit loop—but they don’t hijack your emotional system.
Alcohol does.
Why Alcohol Is Different
Alcohol taps into our neurochemistry. It floods our brain with dopamine and soothes our nervous system—at first.
But over time, our brain starts to expect that relief. Our stress response recalibrates around it. The wiring changes. What started as a weekend reward becomes our default way of coping.
It doesn’t matter how capable, intelligent, or self-aware we are—alcohol can build a loop that logic alone can’t break.
Why This Distinction Matters
When we treat alcohol like it’s just a habit, we tend to reach for habit-based solutions: more discipline, more routines, maybe a self-help book or two.
But when those don’t work, we don’t reassess the strategy—we often turn the blame inward.
We assume we must be the problem. That we’re not trying hard enough. That we’re somehow weaker than everyone else.
And that’s dangerous.
Because it keeps us from asking better questions—like:
What role did alcohol play in my life?
What need was it filling?
What was I trying to cope with, avoid, or escape?
Until we name those things, the urge doesn’t go away—it just hides.
Understanding that alcohol changes how we function gives us permission to go deeper. To stop expecting willpower to fix a chemical and emotional loop. To take a more compassionate, strategic approach to change.
The Danger of Oversimplifying
When we call it “just a habit,” we set ourselves up.
We lean on willpower. We think if we’re smart or successful, we should be able to outthink the urge. But when we try—and fail—it turns inward. Shame. Isolation. Silence.
You’re not failing. You’re just trying to solve the wrong problem with the wrong tools.
What Real Freedom Requires
Freedom doesn’t come from white-knuckling your way through a list of don’ts.
It comes from understanding why alcohol had a role in your life to begin with.
Were you using it to manage stress?
To unwind? To quiet a restless mind?
To handle the constant pressure to perform?
When you can meet those same needs in healthier, more sustainable ways, alcohol stops feeling like the solution. It becomes irrelevant.
You don’t just quit drinking—you eliminate the reason to go back.
You’re Not Alone—and You’re Not Stuck
You’re not stuck because you’re weak.
You’re stuck because alcohol creates a powerful loop in the body and brain.
Breaking that loop takes more than cutting out a behavior.
It takes understanding. Replacement. Purpose.
And that’s how real, lasting change begins.
Where to Go From Here
If you’ve been treating alcohol like a habit—and wondering why you can’t just stop—you’re not alone. And you’re not doing it wrong.
You’re just up against something deeper than routine.
You’re up against chemistry, emotions, and a loop your body has learned to depend on.
The good news? Once you understand that, you can stop blaming yourself—and start working with the real problem.
That’s how lasting change begins.
— Brent