Pressure & Performance Series — Part 5 of 8
Part 1: The Hidden Pain of Overworking and Self-Neglect
Part 2: Work Habits That Lead to Burnout and the Bottle
Part 3: How Long Working Hours Hurt Sobriety (and Productivity)
Part 4: Managing High Stress Without Alcohol
Part 5: The "Whatever It Takes" Approach ← you’re here
Part 6: The Social Pressure Trap: Drinking to Fit In at Work Events
Part 7: Financial Pressure: A Dangerous Excuse to Drink
Part 8: Work-Life Balance: Rebuilding Enjoyment Outside of Work
The Real Reason You’re Drinking Isn’t the Drink
Most high performers aren’t drinking for fun. We drink because we want relief. We want the off switch. We want something that finally says, The day is over. You’re safe now.
We call it “unwinding.” We tell ourselves we’ve “earned it.”
But what we’re really craving is decompression. A full-body, full-system reset that tells our nervous system, You made it. You can come down now.
Here’s the problem. Alcohol mimics decompression. It gives us a shortcut. But over time, it takes more than it gives.
If we want long-term sobriety, we need a replacement. Not a half-hearted one. A powerful, intentional decompression system that works every time.
Why Decompression Isn’t Optional
If your brain is always solving, planning, and pushing, your nervous system is living in “on” mode. That’s not bad in short bursts, but it’s not meant to run all the time.
Without decompression, your system stays locked in high alert. That leads to:
- Insomnia
- Chronic tension
- Emotional numbness
- Impulsive decisions
- Cravings for alcohol
You don’t drink because you’re weak. You drink because your system needs a reset. The answer isn’t just stopping alcohol. The answer is learning to reset on purpose.
What Alcohol Really Does
When you drink to unwind, here’s what happens:
- Your nervous system slows
- GABA increases, which calms you
- Muscles loosen
- Emotional tension drops
So yes, it feels like decompression. But alcohol also:
- Disrupts natural sleep cycles
- Spikes cortisol the next morning
- Weakens your ability to self-soothe naturally
- Trains your brain to link safety with drinking
It isn’t a true decompressor. It doesn’t restore you. It hides the fact that you needed restoration in the first place.
Decompression Is Non-Negotiable
Here’s the mindset shift: decompression is not a luxury. It’s a requirement.
If you don’t make space for it, your body will force it through burnout, illness, or relapse.
Stop asking, Do I have time to decompress?
Start asking, What do I need to remove so I can decompress today?
Making Room Comes First
Real decompression often means saying no to other things.
It can mean:
- Skipping a late dinner
- Letting one more email wait until tomorrow
- Leaving the office before everything is “perfect”
- Stepping away for twenty minutes even if others want your attention
That last one can feel uncomfortable. But if you’re not decompressed, you’re not fully present anyway. Often the best way to show up for others is to step away, recharge, and return clear.
Your Decompression Toolkit
Decompression without alcohol isn’t one-size-fits-all, but it always includes three elements:
1. Physical Regulation
- Slow, deep breathing
- Gentle movement like walking or stretching
- Heat or cold therapy such as a hot shower, sauna, or cold rinse
2. Sensory Calming
- Soft lighting
- Ambient music or silence
- Calming scents like lavender or eucalyptus
- Comfort like a weighted blanket or warm tea
3. Cognitive Offloading
- A quick brain dump in a journal
- A short gratitude list
- Fiction reading instead of self-help
- A tactile activity like drawing or coloring
These aren’t chores. They’re ways to return to the present moment and let your body shift out of “on” mode.
Decompression Rituals That Work
Here are some simple, proven rituals you can use to replace that evening drink:
The Transition Walk
- End your workday with a 15–30 minute walk
- No phone, no podcasts, just breathing and moving
- Let your mind “close tabs” as you go
The Recovery Shower
- Warm water, dim lighting, no rush
- Visualize stress leaving your body
- End with a deep exhale and gratitude
The Five-Minute Reset
- Sit in a quiet spot
- Inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 8
- Tell yourself, The day is over. I’m allowed to rest.
The Music and Movement Drop
- Play a calming playlist
- Stretch, sway, or move however feels natural
- Let your body shake off the day
Choose one or two and make them part of your end-of-day ritual. Protect them like your sobriety depends on them, because it does.
Decompression Together
You don’t have to decompress alone. In fact, shared decompression often makes it stronger.
Options include:
- A post-work debrief with a sober friend
- A walk-and-talk with your partner
- Playing games or making art with your kids
- Quiet time together with books or music
The key is low stakes, low energy, high presence. Not productivity. Not performance. Just calm, shared time.
Whatever It Takes
Decompression isn’t something you do when you “have time.”
If your business were losing money, you’d act immediately. If you were in physical pain, you’d see a doctor. Your nervous system deserves the same urgency.
Whatever it takes means:
- Saying no without guilt
- Scheduling decompression like any other meeting
- Ending work while you still have energy
- Asking for space without apology
- Resting even when things aren’t finished
This isn’t indulgence. It’s self-respect.
Decompression Is Returning
Decompression isn’t about running away. It’s about coming back. Back to your body. Back to calm. Back to clarity.
Alcohol gave you the illusion of that return. Now you’re building the real thing.
It takes structure and intention. But when you get it right, decompression becomes your edge.
The clearer you are, the more powerfully you lead.
The calmer you are, the longer you last.
The more grounded you are, the less you need to escape.
— Brent
→ Next in this series: The Social Pressure Trap: Drinking to Fit In at Work Events